


Shooting the host and 99 other party tricks not to try at home

by Le_mango



Category: The Last of Us
Genre: But it only got 54 on rotten tomatoes, Cheesy, Criminal AU, Dina's a thief, Ellie's a hacker, Every tag I write makes the filter system cry, F/F, Its kinda like an action movie, Morally gray and chaotically horny, lightly grilled, one-shot?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-02
Updated: 2019-07-02
Packaged: 2020-06-02 12:19:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,819
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19441342
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Le_mango/pseuds/Le_mango
Summary: If you need something stolen, try craigslist. If you need to commit a crime, Dina will have everything done in 3-5 business days. No trace left behind and all performed for a modest fee.





	Shooting the host and 99 other party tricks not to try at home

**Author's Note:**

> When your three hours deep into editing long fic and chill and Goblin Mode says, "Haha what if..." Two days and a nap later Goblin Mode won.

“It’s been a quiet night. Should we turn the music up?” Jesse greeted holding his hands out. His hair was pulled back in a high bun. The Italian accent could use some work but no one would notice with the amount of champagne that had already been poured.

“Everyone seems a little excited already. But I’m still looking for some rock and roll. You didn’t do anything while I was gone did you Chang?” Dina stepped in easily dancing to the swift beat. Currently she was dancing with Mr. Paul Fyun Chang. She’d ripped the initials off a popular food brand for kicks. Jesse didn’t notice until she’d already printed the passports. He frowned spinning her around. She took the moment to check the surroundings again.

“I’ve just been watching the dance floor.” He frowned. “Should we leave early?”

Dina shook her head. They came all the way to Florence for this job. She wasn’t going to leave at the first sign of trouble. There was a little blue diamond they were after. It should bring in a weighty check of a few hundred grand. No one was paying attention to the two so Dina leaned closer dropping her voice. “I got through all of the security but someone already fried the cameras and footage for tonight. Security’s already doubled. I couldn’t get to the safe.”

“It’s already gone.” Jesses breath hitched noticing the stiff back of several guards surrounding the ballroom. “How,” He was cut short with a tight squeeze to his shoulder. Dina’s eyes were locked on something behind him.

“You should get a drink. We’re going to be leaving much sooner than expected.” Dina stepped away heading towards a far door. Jess didn’t look back and headed for the extensive table of food.

“Oh my. Your dress is exquisite. Who’s the designer?” A tall woman stepped in front of her wobbling. She spoke French with a heavy drunken slur. A mental count was up to five languages Dina had heard from various guests. 

Dina wasn’t entirely sure on the designer; she’d stolen the red dress a few days before. “My dress? Madam I’m all too impressed with your own. Whoever you’re with tonight, well, I hope they appreciate it.” It didn’t matter if you were in a bar or millionaire’s party, drunk women all speak the same language. She giggled rocking back and Dina reached out supporting her. “My god this fabric is like touching god’s favorite lamb.” Another blushing giggle. A touch here, complement there, keep her attention diverted.

“Thank you.” She blushed finally staggering away after a few rounds of compliments. Dina rolled her eyes turning away. She tucked the heavy silver bracelet in a small pocket next to the other items she’d taken throughout the night. She’d at least be able to cover the plane tickets, plus some, and a little more. But that wasn’t the intended target for now. There was someone else, someone that would know how to fry a high-end security system. Dina stepped into a wide balcony overlooking the Arno River.

“I thought I’d catch you here. What’s the name this time, Madeline?” She sat in a well-fitted suit one leg hanging over the stone railing. Most people referred to her as Byte, Dina thought she looked more like an asshole.

“What are you doing?”

“Woah take it easy Jackie. I’m obviously here for all the free booze.” She grinned checking her phone. “I guess I felt like repaying a favor.”

“Sometimes I feel like I should have let you die.”

She chuckled standing and walking over with slow methodic steps, “Ouch,” she held a hand up to her chest. “I thought we had something special.”

“Is that what you want to call it?”

\----X----

_She was out of ammo ducked behind an armored Jeep. “I really don’t get paid enough for this.” Dina panted trying to call the line again. Still dead. “Fuck.” The rest of her team down and she was easily going next. Well, there was only one thing left to try. Dina jumped up running to the open door. A masked figure stepped in front of her rifle already aimed. “This is it. She’s going to die.” A shot rang out and Dina pressed her eyes shut. The man in front of her crumpled._

_“I didn’t think you were going to run for it.” She turned towards the soft voice. A woman wearing street clothes dropping the pistol to grab a bloodied arm. Dina still didn’t know what to expect but was snapped from her daze as the stranger toppled over. Dina ran back grabbing and dragging her out the door. Once safe she pressed down on the wound until backup finally arrived. They ran in clearing the rest of the building and pulled the two out._

_When they went back to the hospital question the women she’d vanished. Two days gone from the hospital's records and no sign she’d ever existed._

_Dina soon found a new career. Two lucrative years in and she realized there was a very annoying ghost following her. Five more and she still couldn’t shake the tail._

\----X----

“I heard you’re after a little rock.” Dina tensed and she stopped mid-step. “Calm down it's still there. What’s also here is two mob bosses and a few dozen other, unsatisfactory people. It’d be a shame if local police gained access to a large amount of evidence and their current locations.” She stepped closer staring Dina down. While she was barely taller she had an attitude ten times her size. Without breaking eye contact she unbuttoned her jacket pulling a cigarette from the inside pocket.

“I didn’t take you for a smoker.” Dina tried to hold the gaze. The teal button up was glossy and probably more expensive than a small car. It was a perfect complement to her eyes.

“Oh, I’m not. In a few minutes, it’s going to get real hard for everyone here to breathe.” She un-clipped a fabric wallet from her belt handing it to Dina. “I won’t be needing this tonight.”

Dina flipped it open to reveal a golden badge. A fake FBI badge but a damn good copy. Lt. Sadie inscribed in the bottom. “Lieutenant isn’t exactly a rank you’d see on a badge.”

“Good thing it’s not real. The name I mean.” She redid the button of her jacket and held a hand out. “It’s Ellie.”

“Sure it is.”

“Suspicious as always little red.” Her brow cocked up and she pulled a lighter from her pocket. “I’d hang on to that. There’s about thirty seconds until everyone passes out. I’d hurry to the safe if I were you.” She lit the cigarette and it fizzled oddly. Ellie tossed it just inside the door and a line of smoke started coming up, within seconds the alarm started ringing.

Dina stepped forward in disbelief. “You little shit!” She turned seeing an empty balcony. Dina ran towards the rail only seeing ripples in the water below. Sprinklers came to life dowsing the party guests and the water was giving off a pungent smell. “No!” Ellie had managed to wipe her tracks and tamper with the water system, how on earth was she supposed to get to the safe now? The badge shifted in her hand. Dina looked to see a thin face mask in its place. Was she really going to trust that? With a groan she held it up and the mask automatically formed around her head and the smell in the air disappeared. She ran into the room watching as the guest began to slump and fall to the ground. Dina jumped over the guards ripping a painting from the wall. It had taken weeks to find the code and she was met with a satisfying click. The diamond sat on a small stand. She grabbed it and a few other treasures. Okay, it wasn’t a few she took everything she could fit in the pockets hidden throughout the dress.

The air was misty as she ran back through to find her partner. Jesse was passed out with a tiny sandwich in hand. She slapped his back and was met with a small groan. “Come on.” Dina hissed through the mask dragging him up. He was barely conscious. Whatever was in the water must have just been a minor sedative. They stumbled into the courtyard with the car already waiting. Dina threw Jesse into the passenger seat and ran around hitting the gas before she’d even closed the door. As soon as they were off the premises the luxury sports cars exterior shifted to look like a local taxi. The change happened with near perfect timing. The last panel flipped as dozens of police cars came wailing past on the opposite side of the road.

“What the hell happened?” Jess groaned coming too. Dina ripped the mask off seeing a few words glow across the lens.

_‘See you later Red.’_

She scowled rolling down the window and tossed it out. A small burst of flames could be seen in the rearview mirror. “We finished the contract.”

\----X----

She’d always wanted to visit Dubi. The home of action movies and billionaires. There wasn’t any specific job at hand, Dina considered this to be more of a pleasure run. “How about that one? I could make it work.” Jesses voice buzzed in her ear. Just because he’d stayed home didn’t mean he couldn’t help.

“Who says I’m here for you?” Dina mumbled back walking by the silver Bugatti. The plate in front read it was worth just over twelve million.

“A man can dream.”

“A man would come and steal his own car. You’re not going to get anything from today except one of those trees.” Her reflection warped in the mirror finish of a hub cap. Genuine titanium plate and no cup holders? Hard pass.

In the middle of the show was the one. A beautiful red beast. The elevated platform spun slowly ensuring the car displayed could be seen by everyone from every angle. One of a kind fully functional masterpiece simply called ‘Model 2.’ The first had sold for forty million ten years ago. The designer was a man of quality, not quantity. “You’re not actually thinking what I think you’re thinking.”

“It’s my birthday. You said I should get something nice.”

“Jesus Mariel. Nice not absurd. How would you even get it out of there?” Oh, she already had plans. The room filled with a deep voice and she turned towards the stage. The auctioneer was giving the opening spiel.

Everyone gathered around and she found herself on the edge of the group. “I was really hoping for something closer to my range.” A voice stepped behind her and Dina’s smile immediately dropped. “Ten thousand should have covered something decent. Guess I’m just out of luck.” Ellie pushed a pair of square glasses up and Dina caught the edge of an elaborate tattoo peeking out of her sleeve.

“Fuck off,” Dina whispered sharply. The auctioneers chanting echoed around the space masking the conversation.

“I was going to recommend the same for you. You’re being followed.”

“By some goody goody garage hacker.”

“I was already here. Do you have any clue how advanced some of the computer systems,” she cleared her throat to cut herself off, “Francés isn’t too happy that one of the paintings had a tear in it.” Dina stepped back uneasily. How the hell would she know about that? “That and he hates leaving loose ends. You’re the only other person that knows where the paintings went, and technically me but that's beside the point. It’s actually impressive that you managed to steal them without leaving so much as a hair behind.” Hands forced into her pockets as she already got off track again. “There’s about a dozen men here to kill you. The order was sent a few hours ago.” Dina’s jaw twitched. As much as she hated dealing with her the women never lied.

“What’s going on? I’ve gone blind?” Jesses voice was odd and distorted. Byte must have something that was throwing off the signal.

“Why would they come all the way out here?”

“Let’s just say he’s got plenty of enemy’s. Your sudden move was more than enough to cause some paranoia.” An arm wrapped around her waist. Dina’s discomfort wasn’t from the touch but rather something else that stemming it. “Your wire is easy to track. Your friend is going to have to go blind if you want to make it out of here alive. A dull pain above her hip and the earpiece went silent.

“You didn’t.” She turned to see Ellie placing knife back into her blazer pocket. Dina felt a drop of blood roll down her side.

“That sends off a radio signal that can be tracked for miles. Unplugging it sends up a bigger red flag. I’m sorry but I promise that’s the only way to break the connection. I can help you disappear from every database known to god but you have to trust me.”

“I don’t even know who you are,” She snapped preparing to knock the ever-living shit out of this nuisance when three gunshots rang out. The crowd panicked as orders were being shouted by a scarred women holding an automatic rifle in the air, she walked with heavy boots across the roof a Ferrari. People ducked trying to hide behind displays but another shot rang out telling them to freeze.

“Shit.” Ellie crouched tapping at the watch on her wrist and occasionally hitting the sides of the glasses. “I’m sending you to the airport now. There’s a direct flight to Amsterdam you should be able to catch. Tickets are under Scarlet Jones.”

“Why the fuck,”

“Listen to me or get shot.” Ellie looked down with a protective ferocity. “I’ve got a distraction. Get out of here and I promise you won’t have problems with them again.” She reached into her jacket pulling out a short pistol. Without warning the lights in the warehouse shut off. “Come on.” Ellie grabbed her arm running towards one of the walls.

Dina wasn’t sure why she trusted her but there wasn’t time to dwell on it now. That and she was completely blind without being guided through the packed floor. Jess was going to be pissed and right now she didn’t care. Several bright flashlights flared up at different points around them. “Contact!” Ellie’s s head jerked to the side before throwing herself behind Dina.

A short burst of firing and she swore loudly. “Motherfucker! Those hurt.” She shook her arms out and a smashed bullet dropped off the fabric. Dina noticed the other bullets when Ellie popped up returning fire. Soon the bright beam was facing the roof. The reflection cast a dim glow through the rest of the show floor. “What else have you done to piss this guy off?”

“Probably a lot of things.” Dina assumed running close behind. She was at least glad to have opted out of heels for the day. They ran skidding to a stop across hundreds of glass shards. What a shame. “What are you doing?” Dina said trying to make out what was happening in the practically non-existent light.

“Getting. You. Out of here.” A grunt and loud pop as Ellie successfully wedged her knife behind a steel wall panel. “A little help maybe?”

Dina turned grabbing onto the narrow edge pulling the panel out of place. “You’re not excepting me to go through that.” She squinted into a pitch black crawl space.

“Well, I didn’t exactly have time to plan everything.” A hand grabbed her shoulder and turned Dina around. And a pair of glasses was hastily pushed onto her nose. The room brightened into sharp color. “Okay, you can see me?”

“Yeah.” Dina blinked surprised at the sudden contrast. Looking at the face in front of her a small script read in the lens.

“Person: Byte :3. Files: None.”

“Okay. Hit up here to switch to a live security feed. Again for body heat. Last I checked there were only two guards up front, a car is coming around back for you.” Dina kept an ear on the rapid instructions looking out at the rest of the floor. When she focused on one of the gunners her vision suddenly zoomed in. Listing a name, mug shot, and dozens of other files. “You got that?”

“Sure.” Dina nodded looking back again being shown the infuriatingly non-existent bank of information. She could see everything but it looked like Ellie was now effectively blind. Well, there was one way Dina could try to get information. She grabbed the collar of the blazer pulling Ellie close and quickly moved into a deep kiss.

Whatever tough guy facade Ellie was pulling immediately vanished. Dina could feel the surprised breath but she started kissing back. “This is work related only.” Dina mentality insisted running her hands along Ellie’s back looking for anything she could steal. Ellie tried to back off but Dina held tight grabbing onto thin suspenders. There was a soft moan. Dina realized it was her own, “Got it.” She cheered grabbing the wallet and immediately stepping back.

“Oh-okay-okay.” Ellie stuttered. The glasses were still reading body heat and Dina could see the spike around her face. “You really should go.” She readjusted the grip on her pistol staring back out at the still searching lights.

“I’d hate to miss my flight.” Dina leaned over kissing her cheek before stepping into the space behind the wall. That was completely unnecessary and she would slap herself later.

“Yep. Yep. You do that Di- Red.” Ellie set the panel back into place leaving Dina completely alone. Dina’s breath hitched, the last stutter hadn’t gone unnoticed. Did Byte actually know who she was? The lights on the other side came back up based on the glow coming between the narrow slits. Dina shuffled through the narrow space and found the exterior vent exactly where Ellie said it would be. Two kicks and the grate popped out and she stepped out into the hot afternoon and the glasses automatically darkened.

A nearby Jeep rumbled to life as she came close. Dina jumped in and it started driving on its own. “Ohh this is nice.” She mumbled looking at the custom interior. A keychain plush Pokémon hung off the mirror swinging around as the car sped along the line marked on the map. She worked to tear off the pantsuit to a more casual outfit hidden beneath. She hit the glasses checking the security feed of the show room. She barely caught a few seconds of a fistfight before it froze with a blinking ‘out of range.’ One last frame of the mystery tail. The only picture in existence of the person she could still taste... She shook her head trying to clear everything out. A few minutes until she hit the airport. Dina pulled out the wallet and was first met by a few hundred dollars’ worth of Euros. “The hell?” Dina went to pull up the first plastic card.

Blank. A second green edge, she grabbed it and was met with another blank. “No, no, no!” She smacked the dashboard and the car made an upset beep. “Oh shut up! Of course she gave you emotions.”

“Three minutes to your destination.” The overly smooth tone reminded. Dina growled pulling out every card. Fake logos at the top and no other numbers or any defining marks. Just one fake card after the next. The last one had something. She pulled the blue card up to read the small imprint.

“Nice try Red.”

“Damnit!” Dina threw the now empty wallet into the driver seat. Looking up at her reflection the glasses scanned her face.

“Person: Little Red. Files: 1.”

Dina’s eyes widened staring at the number. She must have done something to trigger it since her vision was filled with a translucent image of herself. An old picture in an old uniform. The name was blurred out. The age was blurred out. Height: 5’ 4”. Status: Deceased. She didn’t have time to read over the whole record but she already knew what it said. A red dot blinked in the corner brining up a live feed from one of the airport's cameras. A stiff backed person walking through the crowd in typical tourist gear. It didn’t take a professional to know the posture said everything but family fun.

Dina should have thrown away the glasses. There could be any sort of bugs or tracking built in. She ran through security following the warnings it gave and stepped onto a flight just as the gate closed. First class seating for a very long flight. Just as they were taking off she spotted a red car speeding below. Zooming in it was a model she’d drooled over for years. “That little shit.” Dina frowned turning back. She spent the entire flight blinking through hundreds of side menus. The amount of data here was something a thief could only dream of.

\----X----

Almost six blissfully quite months. Granted the first month Dina ended up laying low. Jesse was beyond pissed when she’d disappeared completely only to show up without even acknowledging it. While they’d successfully lifted a few antique rings and shipping container of collectible dolls since them the relationship was getting a bit, rocky. They both had enough money to live several lifetimes. Dina could sense an end coming to the partnership.

The quote bliss came from the disappearance of a rather annoying person who shall not be named. She wasn’t dead. Dina knows that much. Just about any article that lead with ‘anonymous tip led to...” had Byte written all over it. Sometimes quite literally when typos in the article spelled out different ciphers that led to calling cards. No Dina didn’t spend hours pulling every single one apart.

On top of that Puerto Vallarta was beautiful this time of year. The food was excellent and the views were even better. That made it a top destination for a few certain people as well. “How are we looking on flights?” Dina asked finishing the last of her drink. Nothing beats soda from a glass bottle. On the other hand, glass bottles were excellent for beating.

Jesse looked up with a taco halfway shoved in his mouth. “You know you can check that right?”

“Phones dead.” He rolled his eyes with a sigh forcing the rest of the bite in and wiped his hands across his pants. He made some sort of muffle through the unfinished lunch. “Who raised you?” Dina asked with a repulsed stare.

“Boarding in an hour.” He reluctantly swallowed. “What are you worried about? We’ve still got all day before the flight lands then customs easily gives us an hour to find the luggage.”

“I’m not worried. I just want to go shopping.” Dina grinned grabbing her backpack stepping away from the table.

“Hey,” Jess called out trying to scoot back but the un-even sidewalk caught his chair.

“Come on I’ve never been here before.” She waived. “I’ll be back by three.”

“Seriously?” He groaned.

“Someone’s got to pay the bill.” She called out disappearing into the crowd. Dina spun snickering at the final middle finger she could see. She checked her phone shooting off a quick text. “You know you love it.”

“Fuck you .”

While she genuinely did want to sight-see a little more she backed out to another message that had come a few days before. A date and address from an unknown number. According to every system, she’d run it through it didn’t exist. If that fucker thought she would be coming through the front door she was dead wrong. The address led to an abandoned apartment building halfway up a steep hill. There only seemed to be one camera behind a broken window. The main entrance and it ran directly through its view. The rusting fire escape on the other hand was un-moniterd. Dina pulled on her glasses checking the building. Only one person on the third floor. She should be able to get in the fourth and make her way down.

Dina threw her bag up onto the high platform. Three metal clamps shot out hooking to the metal and a long cable spun out dropping to the ground. She wrapped it around her arm and with a sharp tug was reeled up the twenty feet. She threw a leg over the side and easily pulled herself up. “Okay.” She nodded grabbing the back pack. “First step down.” She worked up the stairway silently with her gun drawn. A few of the steps had large holes rusted into them giving a great view of the endless cliff and jungle below her.

Dina got to the high window on the fourth floor. A simple wooden latch on an already poorly fitted window. She pulled out a thin knife sliding it under the frame and easily pushed the lock open. The window was stiff but she managed to push it up without a sound. From the old blueprints she could find the building was comprised of several penthouse styled apartments with a decorative front and hidden service door. Once in it wasn’t hard to get into the service stairway. She dropped down a floor to the small door. Body heat was reading one person still, a few walls away from where she was.

Dina held a small flashlight in her mouth while working on the lock. It had been replaced recently. Trying to pick it silently added another layer of tension to the whole cake. When the final pin was pushed into place she couldn’t stop the satisfied grin. She quickly put all the tools back into place and rolled the pouch up. The person inside still hadn’t moved. Pulling the latch down she was met with an empty room. The door was partially open and she could see feet propped up on a barstool. Dina kept to the shadows, gun loaded and pointing down. For once she was going to have the upper hand on this ass.

Dina burst into the room raising her gun. “You better have a good exc-“ her gun kept going up pulling her arm along. The glasses started floating up too and her pick set wobbled outbid her back pocket. Within seconds everything shot up sticking to a black pad on the high vaulted roof.

“You do know the front door was open right?” A cocky smile as she bounced a pen on her chin.

Oh, it was on. Dina jumped forward but was pulled to the side with a sudden force. Her bag slammed to another pad on the wall leaving her hanging and barely able to touch the floor. “You fucking knew I’d come in that way?!”

“Well, yeah? There was a camera over the other door.” Ellie sighed setting her laptop on the counter. That alone probably cost more than the rest of the building. She took her time stretching before standing up. A pair of bulky headphones hung around her neck and the button up shirt was hanging completely open. She walked over with bare feet grinning. “Is someone mad their plan didn’t work?” She teased bopping Dina’s nose before looping back to the counter.

“What do you want?” Dina snapped with arms crossed. Although it was hard to look intimidating when her toes were barely scratching the floor.

“Jeez. I was going to ask how you were doing first.” Ellie peeled a tiny banana completely contempt with the new wall hanging. “Let’s just say we can help each other.” She went into a short spiel about the guy Dina was currently trying to rob and the seller he was visiting. I’m just a techie you can get into places I can’t. Closed circuit security, need to get hooked in from inside blah blah blah. “I feel like you’re not really paying attention.” Ellie looked up from the screen.

Dina grunted rocking back and forth trying to unstick herself. “What gives you that idea?” Another low grumble.

A long sigh and Ellie held up a baggie with an innocent looking quarter. “Just leave this chip in the suitcase before you leave. I’ll get my information you’ll get your money.” She waited a moment still watching the ineffective attempts to escape. “If you want to get down you just have to ask.”

“Let me down.” Dina glared back. Ellie hit a button and she dropped to the ground. “And my stuff.” She said staring up at the roof.

“So you can shoot me?”

“So I can bash you in the head.”

“Surprisingly I’m going to wait on that.” Ellie wasn’t paying attention as she frowned at something furiously typing away. “Plan changed. I’m going to delay your guys flight giving you ten extra hours. That should fix everything without,” Dina threw her bag off charging forward. Ellie looked up in time to dodge the initial tackle. “HoooO-kay.” She panicked backing up against the couch.

“Do really think you can just keep telling me what to do?” Dina snarled standing in front of her. “You better be paying more than a fortune if you want me to be placing bugs in the middle of my personal vacation time.” Dina noticed the slight distortion of Ellie’s right pocket.

“You call this personal time?” Ellie nervously tried to joke. In a flash she was pushed back with her own knife being held against her neck.

“Who the hell are you?” Dina asked quietly, one hand wrapped in her shirt the other gripping the stolen knife. Something was familiar about it. The knife was an old model, Dina likely had a similar one in her own collection.

“I’ve already told you.” Dina’s eyes narrowed. Was she really expected to believe a fake name? They sat frozen both breathing heavily. Ellie’s mostly uncovered chest rising and falling. “I can give you whatever you want.” Silence. Why did the world’s most invisible person always seem familiar? Dina’s gaze faltered and Ellie swallowed, the knife following the slight movement. “What do you want?” She asked again softly pushing the knife back. Dina lived in a way she could literally take anything yet,

Ellie leans closer and she doesn’t stop her. Dina’s eyes are already closed by the time their lips meet. Soft light kisses and she might as well have been set on fire. The knife dropped from her hand sticking into the wooden floor. Ellie let go of her hand and it immediately found its way under the open top onto a bare back. The small breaths were just as intoxicating as the building kisses. One hand moved to Dina’s face curling around her ear. The other, well, she had moved it. Pulling it down to where she wanted it.

Ellie grabbed at her thigh leaning further back. Dina followed setting her knee on the couch’s back partially pinning Ellie. She was an infuriating tease. Soft bites, pulling Dina closer with the lightest touch of her tongue. Just to quickly back away into soft and playful kisses again. She had the audacity to laugh at the frustrated groan Dina let out after she leaned away again. “Maybe you weren’t paying attention but you don’t have to rush.” She whispered before kissing under Dina’s ear and working down her neck.

On a good day the hardest locks took about eight minutes to pick. Ellie dismantled all of her defenses in about twenty seconds. Repeatedly. “I’m not trying to you’re just being-“ she didn’t get to finish as Ellie’s shirt fell to the floor. The jellyfish pattern wrinkled into unrecognizable forms. Although Dina didn’t notice that as she was lifted off the floor. Both legs wrapped around her torso and Dina was kissing down. This was an angle she rarely got, and she was not about to give it up. Hands running through her hair, curling around her shoulders. Just this time Dina refused to lose the ongoing war, and there was nothing Byte could do to stop her.

\----X----

Her phone rang vibrating angrily against the floor. “Jesus calm down,” Dina muttered trying to track down where her pants had been left. She found the phone answering shortly. “Yeah, I know I didn’t call but the flight got delayed. We’re still good to go.”

“You disappeared for hours. What the actual fuck Molly?”

“Sorry. There were some crazy dancers last night.” She bit her lip trying to pull the pants on while holding the phone up with her shoulder. There was no sign of Byte which wasn’t too big of a surprise. Also she found the name to be even more fitting.

“Cut me some slack Danny. It’s the last mission we’re doing. Forgive me for enjoying it.” Oh, she enjoyed it all right. “I’ll be back soon.” Dina nearly tipped over trying to put a sock on.

The living room was empty other than her things neatly lining the counter. Even the dark panels had been taken from the wall and roof. The only thing new was a slim key fob and the quarter bug. The glasses looked slightly different but she wasn’t about to toss those. “You owe me ten extra percent just for the annoyance.”

Dina laughed placing everything back into its designated pocket. “That seems a little steep.”

“Fifteen and another added for every minute it takes to get back.”

“Fine. How about two and you shut the hell up. You can’t even get in the airport without me.” The call ended abruptly and Dina snorted again. “Bitch.” A quick check, shirt tuck and she was set to go. Dina ran down the stairs trying to stretch out still sore legs. Oops. A side door led to a nearly empty garage. In the middle sat the one and only Model 2. Red and almost as glowing as the last time she’d seen it. The doors clicked open as soon as she was in range and dine jumped into the driver seat grinning like a goddamn idiot.

“Oh heeeello,” Dina purred listening to the low rumble of the engine starting up. A screen flipped up from the dashboard showing a red-cloaked cartoon with a wolf trailing behind. Just how many things could she have added to the car in the time it had been missing? Dina hit the road sending a cloud of dust up behind her. An automatic playlist popped up and opened with a guitar rift. More importantly what music did Byte choose for the Little Red mix.

\----X----

Moving was something Dina had forgotten about. More than anything it was a pain. Not having a kitchen for weeks was really starting to wear on her. Apparently, it was possible to get sick of pizza. She stepped into the hazard zone of a house jumping out of her skin at the lanky figure on the couch. “What the hell Jesse! Why are you in my house?”

“Broke in.” He shrugged as if that should have been the obvious answer. “Where have you been keeping all of this shit? I’ve known you for years and have only seen three different shirts.” He flipped through the pages of a book.

“Dude seriously? You could have called first.” Dina grabbed the book setting it aside. She also should have switched the locks a month ago.

He sat up with a flat grin. “Just had to bring the last of the Florence payment.” Jesse held a dark flash drive up between two fingers as Dina went to grab it he dropped it into his hand. “Nah-ah-ahh.” A single finger wiggles in the air. “Not until you tell me about this.” Jesse grabbed an old photo holding it to the light.

“God I haven’t looked at most this stuff since I died.” Dina groaned squinting closer at the young awkward blob. Of course he found one when she was smack in the middle of puberty. “That was a summer camp when I was fourteen. Come to think of it half the counselors were arrested the week after for selling dope to kids.” His brow rose expectantly. “No I didn’t take any. Do I look like a rich white boy?”

“In certain lights.”

Dina grabbed the photo smacking his hand for the drive. “Get out.”

“Fine.” Jesse grinned standing up. “Are you sure you don’t need help unpacking. I’d love to go through more of your stuff.”

“Go.” She was practically pushing him out only to be met with more chuckling.

“I’m going just,” he grinned leaning on the door frame. “If you ever get bored of nothing Wyoming I’ll be in Malibu.”

“I’m already bored just listening to you. Bye.” She closed the door and picked her way back to the couch. Dina hummed looking over the photo again. That really was ages ago. There was someone in the back that caused her to squint. They were mostly cut off just bulky headphones and a few whisps of hair. “What the fuck?”

Dina dug through the open box. There were more pictures from that summer somewhere. She found the shoebox ripping the lid off. Dozens of pictures and there she was again. The girl who fell onto a fire ant hill and was covered in bites the entire week. Reclusive and tempermental after suddenly losing both parents. She didn’t talk to anyone until Dina had figured out a way to tye-dye dicks into the dumb t-shirts. Byte had never lied about her name. Only changed it a few weeks after being adopted.

Half the counselors arrested from an anonymous tip. “Oh my god.” Dina’s mouth had dropped to the floor as she sat staring at the stacks of old photos. How could she have forgotten? Literally the only other person in the camp that liked the banana popsicles. She’d break into the cafeteria freezer and grab them by the handful. Byte the literal bug magnet that found out she was allergic to a certain spider the hard way. She’d nearly scratched her entire arm off. They’d managed to find the camps Wi-Fi password and skipped out on the boring games to watch movies.

Ellie-fucking-Williams. There was an entire world to search. Good thing she was a professional at finding what didn’t exist. Maybe there was one final round to play in this game.

\----X----

“Oh I didn’t order anything.” Ellie held a hand up as the waitress started to set a cup down.

She shook her head leaving the drink. “Someone told me to send it. It’s already been paid for.” They walked away without another word.

Ellie inspected the contents with a short sniff. Hot chocolate, thank god it wasn’t something ridiculous. She turned the cup to see ‘Williams’ scribbled on the side. Her eyes widened covering the name with her hand as she scanned the floor around her. No one she recognized and she hadn’t gotten any alerts of someone being in the area. She nervously dropped a finger double checking that the writing was real. The more she stared at it the more one of the L’s looked like an arrow. She glanced up at the balcony above spotting a familiar figure hunched over a newspaper. “What are you playing at?” She muttered heading towards the stairs. They didn’t look up when she pulled the opposite chair out.

“Well you look, nervous. I could have used your actual name but that just would have been rude. Wouldn’t it Mrs. Miller?” Ellie’s chest righted.

“What do you want?” She asked casually trying to act like she wasn’t about to smoke bomb and run out of the place.

“Female sheep. Three letters.” Dina tapped a pen on her lip. She finally glanced up from the paper, “Oh, maybe you missed the news but I’ve retired.”

“You seem awfully young to be doing that.”

“Figured I’d quit while I was still ahead. And not in jail.” She finished folding up the paper and setting it aside. She held a hand out. “It’s Dina by the way. But you already knew that.”

Ellie’s head tilted with a small smile. “I didn’t know it was supposed to be a secret.”

“I’m trying to back away from those. I’m thinking of opening a flower shop or something small to help with all my laundry. Somewhere quiet, excellent WiFi. I might be retired but,”

“Thinking you’ll get bored?”

“Maybe.” Dina adjusted slightly her foot hitting Ellie’s under the small table. Neither of them moved. “I’d love to catch up. It’s been years since we’ve actually talked.”

She laughed shyly looking away. “As long as you have a way to keep the mosquitoes out.”

“I think we can manage that.”

Ellie took a long drink, a few marshmallows bumping her lip. “So,” she set the cup down spinning the name outward, “Have you ever been to New Zeland?”

**Author's Note:**

> Wow okie. You all have permission to break into my house and tell me to stop. 
> 
> Also, not to sound like a youtuber but leave a comment on what Goblin Mode's legal name should be.


End file.
